Attunement
"Balance is not something you find, it's something you create." ~Jana Kingsford
In our day-to-day lives, it’s all too easy to be coerced into wearing the cloak of wants + needs + expectations + demands from our circle of family, friends, community, and work. We assume roles, take on responsibilities and generally conform out of obligation and duty. Letting our fundamental necessities and desires take a back seat.
The Pledge: “I’ll make time to care for my needs later.”
Later never arrives; you’re too overwhelmed and exhausted. That promise you made? Crushed under the weight of coming to the rescue of everyone but yourself. You become consumed with tending to the next “of-the-moment” priority instead of allowing yourself to respond intentionally.
I’ve recently been focused on calibration in my life - to themes and aspirations essential for finding balance within myself, both personally and professionally. It’s an ongoing process. One that includes daily self-care rituals and full-body “listening” so that I can course-correct when I find myself drifting away from my goals.
Inner calibration includes looking at the dark underbelly of any suppressed emotions. And then fully feeling them in the body to process and release them while also putting the mind to rest.
Emotion is what creates thought; mindset work alone will not make lasting change. You MUST deal with any unresolved emotional baggage for it to help you shift into a new state of being.
As long as your body is under stress, the pattern will repeat itself. It doesn’t matter what you tell your brain on a conscious level if your body is mapping and perpetuating a stressful reality.
Your body keeps the score.
Somatic therapies, like breathwork, help the nervous system’s capacity to manage challenges. As you learn to regulate your emotions, your body and mind follow suit. You cut new neural pathways, learn to respond in a healthy way, and instill resilience as your new normal.
By being with the discomfort and letting your body’s cues be your guide, the underlying cause will eventually rise to the surface. Often, it’s tied to an old trauma or negative event that the subconscious has recorded and stored. It’s a warning system.
Whenever you meet a similar situation or emotional challenge, your body sends the message, “Pay attention!”
Prioritize intentional time to process your emotional and physical responses as you reflect on current people, projects, and commitments. Don’t allow your mind to be in the driver’s seat. Trusting that if there’s resistance, there’s a reason. That means there’s more work to do.
You’ll begin to see themes emerge. Allow for curiosity. Replace judgment and negative self-talk with grace, love, and compassion. FEEL IT ALL >>> When you’re ready, release it.
The power of this sensory practice is the clarity to see where you need to place intentional effort and who is worthy of your time. It’ll help eliminate anything that strains or drains your well-being.
It’s not a selfish act to take care of yourself. It’s essential to your mind-body-spirit alignment.
Emotional Processing Practice: Orienting To Your Body
Everything we consciously experience, including the felt sensations of the body, are forms of communication that require expression. Your triggers tell a story about how your body has processed this information. By being aware of your response, you can tap into the emotions that arise to better understand, process and release the experience.
Notice if there is a particular image, sensation, awareness, or understanding that offers clarity to the situation or helps you resolve the event. If nothing emerges, it’s alright. Simply engaging with the process of slowing down, consciously controlling your breath, and cultivating awareness is progress all on its own.*
*Note: This exercise does not replace traditional therapy. It’s a technique you can practice in addition to talk-therapy work. If you’re in therapy, record anything new you notice while doing this exercise and bring it to your next session to continue the integration and release process. If you’re not in therapy and realize that a lot has come up for you, consider finding a therapist who works with somatic practices to heal your mind and body.