Extra•Ordinary ~ The Art of Friendship Edition

Cultivating deeper connections in life.

“Friendship is a sheltering tree.” ~Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Photo by Tina Derusha | ‘Telekinesis’

My dear one,

Life is moving at warp speed, and sometimes, it feels like the world is shouting at me from every direction. The noise. The demands. The endless stream of distractions. It’s exhausting. It’s isolating. And it makes me cling even tighter to the things that matter most: peace, presence, and the people who make my little corner of the world feel like home.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about how to build and nurture my friendships. I try to imagine my emotional wellbeing as an inner fortress of calm, one that’s fortified with resilience sentries; the habits and boundaries that guard my mental, emotional, and spiritual health. But no fortress stands alone. My friendships and my community are what make it strong.

Each year, I choose three guiding words; they serve as my personal compass for how I want to live. These words help me navigate my choices, shape my actions, and remind me who I want to be. This year, one theme rose to the top: connection. In contemplation, I chose “contribute” as one of my words, a gentle nudge to lean in, show up, and pour into the people around me.

Because here’s the truth: good friendships don’t just happen. They require care, effort, and an open heart.

I’ve created a personal blueprint for my “friendship ecosystem” because I want to be intentional about how I engage with the people in my life. There’s no hierarchy. Each connection has value, but there is a simple expectation: If you have access to me, you must also be willing to put in the work.

Last month, I did something that scared me. I went to a creative networking event alone.

If you’ve ever walked into a room full of strangers and felt that creeping panic, you get it. The moment I entered the building, my fight-or-flight instincts kicked in, and I immediately beelined for the bathroom to give myself a pep talk.

"Suck it up. You can do this."

A few deep breaths later, I forced myself to walk out, make eye contact, and start a conversation. Awkward? At first. Worth it? Absolutely. Within minutes, I met a beautiful trio of women, and by the end of the event, we’d already exchanged numbers and planned our first coffee date.

Here’s what I learned: The magic we crave (the friendships, the laughter, the feeling of belonging) is on the other side of our comfort zone. We just have to be brave enough to reach for it.

Beyond meeting new people, I’ve been savoring the friendships already close to my heart. I set aside an afternoon each week just for nurturing these connections. Sometimes, it’s a coffee date, a long walk, a crafting project, or an afternoon lost in a museum. Other times, it’s simply sitting in comfortable silence, being together without needing to do anything at all.

Good friendships are like an intoxicating French perfume, lingering long after the moment has passed, leaving their imprint on your heart.

We need each other. Beyond small talk. Beyond surface-level interactions. Beyond the perfectly curated social media versions of our lives. Real friendships are the kind that anchor us, heal us, and hold us together. They require vulnerability, time, and intention.

They will carry us through everything.

In connection and community,

Tina

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Practice

Photo by Claudio Schwarz on Unsplash

Nurture Deeper, More Meaningful Connections

Friendship is truly an art, isn’t it? Think about how your social connections shape your emotional wellbeing. They’re those bonds that lift you up, make you laugh, and sometimes even challenge you. In a world that often feels chaotic and overwhelming, your friendships ground you, offering warmth, comfort, and joy.

Let’s explore what it takes to build stronger connections, deepen friendships, and create a social circle that fuels you.

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The Power of Belonging

You’re wired for connection. Friendship is a fundamental part of your emotional wellbeing. Good friendships boost your mood, provide a safety net in tough times, and remind you that you’re seen, valued, and loved.

At their best, friendships act as mirrors, reflecting both your strengths and the areas where you might grow. A friend’s encouragement nudges you to take risks, embrace change, or chase big dreams. They keep you accountable, remind you who you are, and push you to become the best version of yourself.

And here’s the science to back it up: Research shows that people with strong social ties experience lower stress, reduced risk of depression, and overall higher life satisfaction. Why? Because having people who truly understand and support you makes life’s ups and downs easier to navigate.

Friendships do more than just make you happy. They physically and emotionally impact your health. When you engage in meaningful conversations and feel seen and heard, your brain releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone that builds trust and closeness.

But here’s the flip side: Loneliness is an epidemic. We live in a time of instant messaging and constant scrolling, where you may still feel deeply disconnected. Virtual likes and comments don’t replace the power of a face-to-face conversation, a belly laugh, or a comforting hug.

To maintain strong mental health, learn to go beyond surface-level interactions and make space for genuine connection. It can be through in-person meetups, deep conversations, or shared experiences; investing in friendships is one of the most powerful things you can do for your wellbeing.

The best friendships are about showing up for one another through every season of life.

These are the friendships where:
✓ You feel safe being your most unfiltered, unpolished self.
✓ You can sit in silence and still feel deeply understood.
✓ You celebrate each other’s successes as if they were your own.
✓ You know that no matter what, you have someone in your corner.

Celebrate those friendships. Here’s how:

• Express gratitude. Tell your friends what they mean to you and thank them for their support.

• Create traditions. Weekly coffee chats, annual getaways, spontaneous dance parties; find little rituals that make your friendship feel sacred.

• Reflect together. Reminisce on your best memories and dream about the future.

• Say "I love you." It’s one of the most beautiful things you can share. Say it, mean it, and show it in your actions.

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Perspective

Simon Sinek & Trevor Noah on Friendship, Loneliness, Vulnerability, and More:

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Pep Talk

Friendship is a choice. An investment. A daily practice.

So, how are you nurturing your friendship ecosystem this year? Who do you need to reach out to? What small act of connection can you commit to today?

Because life is better — richer, brighter, fuller — when we’re in it together.

Social media DOES NOT COUNT as real connection, nor should it replace reaching out and checking in. Don’t be fooled by mindless scrolling, where content is spoon-fed to us. It only creates a false sense of connection instead of fostering meaningful relationships. Social media is often a curated, polished highlight reel. It doesn’t show the full picture of someone’s lived experience. Connection happens offline. Seek it out.

If life feels too busy, try scheduling friendship check-ins like you would any other important commitment. A voice note, a spontaneous “thinking of you” text, or a 10-minute catch-up call can mean everything.

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Power Statement

I nurture my friendships with intention, presence, and gratitude. I step beyond comfort, embrace authenticity, and invest in the relationships that uplift and sustain me. Connection is my foundation, and I choose to show up, give freely, and receive with an open heart.